Happy Corporate Birthday
So our VP of HR had his birthday yesterday. As a token of appreciation, the powers that be circulated a card and asked the collected drones to sign it. Now most of my fellow drones went with typical "Happy Birthday" type sentiments. And that's fine for most people.
As a professional writer, however, I feel a certain obligation to stand out. If it's written down, it has to be cleverer(erer?) than everybody else. Cause I'm awesome like that. It should be something that the powers that be will read and say "Hey, I like the attitude on that Manion boy. Let's give him a $90,000 raise!"
So I hung on to the card for most of the afternoon waiting for the muse to sing. And eventually she did. And I wrote "Party like a rock star 'till the cops shut you down!" And then I included my initials and a little picture of a headbanging stick figure. This picture is actually much better than the one I drew, but it gets the message across. Mine had a little stick guitar.
Apparently some felt that the message was little "raw" for an elderly man whose biggest hobby is taking care of his prize lhaso apsos. I figure hey, if the guy doesn't have much time left, he might as well go out with a bang. I know I'd rather waste my estate on hookers and blow than give to my descendents.
In any event, it worked out okay. Me and the VP are going to Vegas next month to rage. Should be fun.
LM
As a professional writer, however, I feel a certain obligation to stand out. If it's written down, it has to be cleverer(erer?) than everybody else. Cause I'm awesome like that. It should be something that the powers that be will read and say "Hey, I like the attitude on that Manion boy. Let's give him a $90,000 raise!"
So I hung on to the card for most of the afternoon waiting for the muse to sing. And eventually she did. And I wrote "Party like a rock star 'till the cops shut you down!" And then I included my initials and a little picture of a headbanging stick figure. This picture is actually much better than the one I drew, but it gets the message across. Mine had a little stick guitar.
Apparently some felt that the message was little "raw" for an elderly man whose biggest hobby is taking care of his prize lhaso apsos. I figure hey, if the guy doesn't have much time left, he might as well go out with a bang. I know I'd rather waste my estate on hookers and blow than give to my descendents.
In any event, it worked out okay. Me and the VP are going to Vegas next month to rage. Should be fun.
LM
posted by Lance Manion at 9:42 AM
3 Comments:
Mr. Scoop has recently discovered that his new boss enjoys dead hooker jokes. However, he also likes to listen to "It's Raining Men" loudly on WinAmp, so who knows...
Next year, include a gift of booze and OTC medication with your party-ous urgings. That'll definitely get the head hammerin' started.
Are you fellas taking lhaso apsos with you? I know I would. The strippers would love them.
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