Maine: The Personalized License Plate State

While driving through Maine this past weekend, I was struck by how many vanity plates were out there. It almost seems like you're required to get one.

But out among the RNRSTOYs, and VRAMPADs, one plate really stood out to me. It was a beatup red pickup truck with the license plate RVENGE. Now when this guy follows you for 50 miles because you cut him off, it's not like you can really act surprised.

At the same time, though, do you really want to advertise that you're a ticking time bomb? If the neighbor's dog gets gutted and nailed to a tree, I bet the cops are going to want to talk to the guy who has advertised his interest in vengeance. Especially if it turns out that little woogums was whizzing in this guy's gardenia bed.

It turns out that little woogums was whizzing in this guy's gardenia bed.

I can just imagine that conversation with the law.

Cop: Excuse me sir, we're wondering if you know anything about what happened to the neighbors' dog?

RevengeGuy: Um. No, nope. Don't know anything about that.

Cop: Really? We've heard that you complained about him urinating on your lawn.

RevengeGuy: Oh, well yeah... but I'd never hurt someone's pet.

Cop: Not even for revenge?

RevengeGuy: Crap! Stupid license plate! Yeah, I did it! And I'd do it again. I love revenge!

There are just some license plates that are bad ideas. Plates like GUN-NUT, KRAKHED, and NDRCVRCP, just beg for disaster. But in Maine, everybody's got one. I guess it's a good thing I don't live there anymore.

LM