Monday, March 20, 2006

Danger Manion

So this past Saturday morning, I was driving along a windy country road behind a beat up old Camry. Nothing was out of place was we drove along. And then we went through a broad curve. And the Camry decided that it didn't want to be constrained by existing social mores regarding things like roads and lanes. Instead of following left through the curve, it continued straight, at about 45-50 miles an hour.

The first thing it hit was a telephone pole, blasting it to pieces and ripping down the power lines. I would have thought the pole would stop the car, but I was wrong. It continued through a front yard, and into a couple of parked cars. It was pretty spectacular.

I pulled over to see if the driver was okay.

The family that lived in the house came to the window and immediately called 911.
The driver seemed okay. A little disoriented, perhaps. I'm not sure if the disorientation was from the crash, or perhaps a little St. Paddy's day fun that ran late. After all, with no brake lights, no skid, no effort to avoid anything, we're clearly not talking the most alert driver in the world.

He seemed a little bothered by the damage, and after telling me that he was okay, started walking away. I wasn't sure what to do, but I didn't want to physically restrain the guy, so I stayed at the scene of the accident and waited for the police.

The cops arrived about five minutes later, having picked up the driver on their way up. The first officers ran the plates of the car. After that, it got exciting. The conversation went something like this:

Cop - Is this your car?

Driver - Um, yeah.

Cop - Surprise! No it's not.

Turns out the car was stolen! And forty-three more cruisers suddenly appear.

So I had been the only witness to a real Grand Theft Auto style fiasco. The family whose yard and cars were trashed were more than a little irate. I had to hang out for a while and give a statement to the cops. They really doubt that I'll be asked to be a witness or anything. Still, I like that I've done my bit for the justice system.

LM

4 Comments:

Blogger Sara said...

How does it feel to be on this side of the law?

5:55 PM  
Blogger Latigo Flint said...

Did that cop really say "Surprise!" and then "No, it's not."????

If so, then he just became the raddest guy ever--and I don't even really like cops on principle.

3:07 AM  
Blogger V said...

Well, he did better than some guy down here this week, who just got pulled over for no registration, ran away from the cops, fell into a giant mud puddle, and got SUCKED DOWN AND DIED.

The news reports I heard said the cops were "very disappointed" not to have pulled his dumb ass free. But maybe it was justice... maybe he'd slain someone and gotten away with it. Why else would you run from a simple no-sticker ticket?

12:13 AM  
Blogger Lance Manion said...

Sara - it's kind of disquieting. I had to really fight the urge to sucker punch the cop and 'jack a cruisr.

Latigo - Sadly, no. I embellish. In reality the conversation went more like, "It was you wasn't it? Don't bullshit me, it was you!"

Ari - I heard about that guy. Man, that sucks, to shuffle off this mortal coil because of a mud puddle.

Fightguy - I dunno. Given how out of it this guy was, he probably wouldn't notice his new buddy for a couple of days, depending on how sensitive a lover the bull-strangler is.

1:51 PM  

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